Ramble, Ramble, Ramble...Hear This Mommy Ramble

I have a special announcement...I am an Aunt...again!

My sweet nephew graced this world with his presence about 5:00 pm yesterday!!

His name is Evan Curry...he was 7 lbs. and 14 oz. And he is SO precious!!

Everyone is doing great and they all went home this evening to begin their lives as a family of 4.

I vaguely remember being a family of 4...cause we were only a family of 4 for 8 months when we found out that we were going to be a family of 5! ha ha ha..I laugh case there is nothing I can do about it now!! And actually I don't remember being a family of 5 for very long before we were adjusting to the idea of become a family of 6! But I digress.

ummm...

We are spending Labor Day weekend working out at the property. We are running the water lines and the electrical conduits. Does is sound like I know what I am talking about? I hope so...cause really, all I got out of it is that I am going to be gluing pipes together.

Jealous aren't you!?

Well you can't come! Unless you really want to and then I might be able to work out a deal for you.

My dear brother spent an entire day at work last week trying to come up with a name for the "homestead", cause he is weird like that. He came up with the name "Antebellum Ridge." Now, I am looking for the perfect pieces of wood to paint a large sign! Cause I am weird like that.

I have fought with the scary neighbor people again this week. I am trying so hard to be nice...but nice is about to run dry. I am about to have an exposition of my ninja/ticked off momma skills. Should it happen I'll take pictures for you.

My parents are here, cause I am their favorite kid and they love me more than anything in the whole world (and maybe the fact that there is a new grandbaby has something to do with them being here too, whatever) and my dad...the man who it took 26 years of my life for him to get an answering machine, the man who reads college western civ books and math books... FOR FUN...is going to get on FACEBOOK.

Folks, I am not positive, but that may be a sign of the apocalypse!!!!!

That is all I am gonna say about that. But I am stocking up on canned goods and water.

School is going to get into full swing on Tuesday. We had a few new kinks come up and I have had to try to get a fresh perspective on our situations, so we scaled way back for the last 2 1/2 weeks while I get refocused on what needs to be done.

It is amazing to me that I am still having to look at our situation and redefine what "normal" is for our family. It isn't bad...it is just different and it takes some time to let the cloud of pity blow away and really just figure out what normal is for our family. We are getting there. I am sure that all special needs families deal with this. It is yucky and I wish it were different...so very different, but these are the cards that have been dealt to us and we will make the best out of them. We will make it and we will shine as we go!

I have been blessed lately with meeting more special needs moms who have questions about a certain diagnosis, or funding for a compression vest or questions about how to deal with others or the school administration that isn't helping, or doctors...and I am greatful. Grateful that I can help them see that it really is manageable. That they will figure this scary road out and that they CAN walk the road laid before them.

They are in Holland and nobody asked if they wanted to go.

I get that.

I am in Holland too.

I know this is somewhere on my blog..but it's my blog and I like it so I am putting it here again.....and I changed it a little to fit my family.

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising multiple children with disabilities - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.